This was such a great discussion of a doomed? fraught? relationship on the show. Personally I never understood why Brynn’s clear bullying tactics and toxic gossiping was never really called out - or when it was, never seemed to stick. I was also uncomfortable with how much she seemed to enjoy saying mean gossipy things about other people; there was a gleefulness to it. Meanwhile, Ubah’s frequently misconstrued sense of humour seemed to attract nothing but negativity for her.
Yeah it was so weird, I couldn’t figure out if it was just the edit at first but I think they really just let Brynn act like that. Her saying Jenna had money problems was wild!!! It felt like something Ramona Singer would say in earnest. And yeah Ubah was hilarious this season in spite of the bullying and provocation. Calling the women pigeons and the “why are you here” scenes had me cracking up!! I love her confidence and I think she could really come into her own if she returns to the show
I loved you describing racism as the water and not the shark. It’s such a spot on description. One day, I’ll write about a friendship I had that was very similar to this. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you! I saw that quote on Instagram years ago and it really resonated. And yes please share your story when you’re ready! as frustrating as it to know it’s a fairly common thing, it’s good to remember we’re never alone in our experiences
THIS. The Housewives franchise has been declining for years and this incident was one of the ones that topped the cake. We no longer can exploit people for their trauma and use it as clickbait especially at the hands of a black woman. Great post!
"That’s why they hired top racial relations scholar Nicki Minaj to host the season six Potomac reunion when there had been mounting pressure from viewers to discuss the colorism allegations on the show." SCREAMING! This piece is too good!
“They may want the best for you, but only as long as it’s not better than their own.” Unfortunately too real, perfectly put into words an experience of mine
Loved this article! Another thing about Brynn is her weird fake gay behavior. I would think having two lesbians in committed relationships on the show would shut that shit down but it didn’t. I would be uncomfortable with her flirting with Jenna lol.
YES this!!!! Between this weird shit, Mia and Jacquelyn on Potomac, and Kyle on BH, there’s been this really strange undercurrent of sapphophobia dressed up as fetish in the housewives franchises lately. It needs to end. Idk why it irritates me so much but the fake gay thing was never cute to me.
Loved this essay! So well written. I would also add that Brynn (in my humble opinion) shows consistent signs of Narcissistic behavior. So she cleverly pulled strings, whispered in people’s ears, and caused divides between the girls so that the attention was on her and everyone was crawling to her. As someone who has experienced this behavior, even the smartest people don’t catch on until they cut the person out and have conversations with others who were impacted to realize what really happened. Colorism is a device and weapon she’s using to her benefit, but there’s something much darker and psychologically twisted about Brynn that none of the ladies could’ve possibly realized until she was caught red-handed in the finale episode.
Thank you! And this is an interesting perspective for sure, in all my time watching reality tv, whether it’s Survivor or Housewives I always think “I can’t believe they don’t see what’s happening here.” even with the knowledge that I’m watching it after the fact and from a million different camera angles. But my other thought is that if someone is smart enough to scheme like this, there’s gotta be someone equally smart who can figure them out. Quite a few times, there is. These ladies are media trained to the nth degree but I think they’re still not really socially aware (a great trait for a housewife, a terrible trait for a friend), which is why they didn’t catch it sooner and actively allowed it to go on for so long. Tell the Bees just wrote a great essay on it!
I can’t speak to Brynn’s state of mind either but I agree there does seem to be something seriously wrong, like you said the narcissistic traits keep jumping out at the cast and at us. I think she needs to fire her therapist and seek more effective treatment. I’m sorry you experienced similar behavior, thank you for sharing here 🧡
Thank you for sharing your experience as well! I would agree and I think she targeted Ubah because Ubah clocked her crazy from the beginning of the season. Nobody likes the truth teller till the truth is confirmed!
I just wanted to thank you for this, I really appreciate you writing it. As a woman I was horrified at Brynn’s behaviour in the RHONY finale, but as a white woman there were elements I had not considered. Thank you for taking the time.
loved this article and thank you for sharing! i’ve been feeling nervous/interested/unsure how they are going to handle this conversation at the reunion and will be disappointed/not surprised if it’s not handled well
Ohhh it will not be. I’m not holding out any hope for that. I’m predicting yelling, sobbing, and a lot of Andy making these faces 😟😞 before someone brings out cocktails, they do the most forced toast ever and rush to credits.
This episode had me shook for days and this article perfectly articulates why. I was even talking to people who would never watch reality tv in a million years about it like, I know you don’t partake in this mess but I need to talk about what just happened to me! Brynn has driven me crazy this entire season with the gaslighting and manipulating but this finale was a final straw. Her trauma has turned her vile and it’s her responsibility to do something about it.
Yes! Everyone supposedly hates the new rhony so there aren’t as many people to discuss it with. I can’t believe it go so dark so quickly. I said this in an earlier comment but she really needs to fire that therapist she speaks of and seek serious treatment.
This was a beautifully written analysis."It was kind of amazing to watch someone utilize White tears while referring to their Blackness."... exactly. Brynn's brazen manipulation this season was insane to watch & although it's an established pattern of behavior, it is obvious she had it out for Ubah since the start.
Hey bud, not sure why you'd leave this under a post about racial trauma but go off! Love the white delusion and audacity; hope you find your audience!
Mhmm, I'm interested to know if you read the piece all the way through and if so, what you took away from it
I have so many thoughts.
Please share!
Too good. More please 🧐
This was such a great discussion of a doomed? fraught? relationship on the show. Personally I never understood why Brynn’s clear bullying tactics and toxic gossiping was never really called out - or when it was, never seemed to stick. I was also uncomfortable with how much she seemed to enjoy saying mean gossipy things about other people; there was a gleefulness to it. Meanwhile, Ubah’s frequently misconstrued sense of humour seemed to attract nothing but negativity for her.
Yeah it was so weird, I couldn’t figure out if it was just the edit at first but I think they really just let Brynn act like that. Her saying Jenna had money problems was wild!!! It felt like something Ramona Singer would say in earnest. And yeah Ubah was hilarious this season in spite of the bullying and provocation. Calling the women pigeons and the “why are you here” scenes had me cracking up!! I love her confidence and I think she could really come into her own if she returns to the show
I loved you describing racism as the water and not the shark. It’s such a spot on description. One day, I’ll write about a friendship I had that was very similar to this. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you! I saw that quote on Instagram years ago and it really resonated. And yes please share your story when you’re ready! as frustrating as it to know it’s a fairly common thing, it’s good to remember we’re never alone in our experiences
Perfectly stated
Thank you Alex! 🧡
THIS. The Housewives franchise has been declining for years and this incident was one of the ones that topped the cake. We no longer can exploit people for their trauma and use it as clickbait especially at the hands of a black woman. Great post!
"That’s why they hired top racial relations scholar Nicki Minaj to host the season six Potomac reunion when there had been mounting pressure from viewers to discuss the colorism allegations on the show." SCREAMING! This piece is too good!
ahahaha thank you!! 🧡
“They may want the best for you, but only as long as it’s not better than their own.” Unfortunately too real, perfectly put into words an experience of mine
Loved this article! Another thing about Brynn is her weird fake gay behavior. I would think having two lesbians in committed relationships on the show would shut that shit down but it didn’t. I would be uncomfortable with her flirting with Jenna lol.
YES this!!!! Between this weird shit, Mia and Jacquelyn on Potomac, and Kyle on BH, there’s been this really strange undercurrent of sapphophobia dressed up as fetish in the housewives franchises lately. It needs to end. Idk why it irritates me so much but the fake gay thing was never cute to me.
Loved this essay! So well written. I would also add that Brynn (in my humble opinion) shows consistent signs of Narcissistic behavior. So she cleverly pulled strings, whispered in people’s ears, and caused divides between the girls so that the attention was on her and everyone was crawling to her. As someone who has experienced this behavior, even the smartest people don’t catch on until they cut the person out and have conversations with others who were impacted to realize what really happened. Colorism is a device and weapon she’s using to her benefit, but there’s something much darker and psychologically twisted about Brynn that none of the ladies could’ve possibly realized until she was caught red-handed in the finale episode.
Thank you! And this is an interesting perspective for sure, in all my time watching reality tv, whether it’s Survivor or Housewives I always think “I can’t believe they don’t see what’s happening here.” even with the knowledge that I’m watching it after the fact and from a million different camera angles. But my other thought is that if someone is smart enough to scheme like this, there’s gotta be someone equally smart who can figure them out. Quite a few times, there is. These ladies are media trained to the nth degree but I think they’re still not really socially aware (a great trait for a housewife, a terrible trait for a friend), which is why they didn’t catch it sooner and actively allowed it to go on for so long. Tell the Bees just wrote a great essay on it!
I can’t speak to Brynn’s state of mind either but I agree there does seem to be something seriously wrong, like you said the narcissistic traits keep jumping out at the cast and at us. I think she needs to fire her therapist and seek more effective treatment. I’m sorry you experienced similar behavior, thank you for sharing here 🧡
Thank you for sharing your experience as well! I would agree and I think she targeted Ubah because Ubah clocked her crazy from the beginning of the season. Nobody likes the truth teller till the truth is confirmed!
I just wanted to thank you for this, I really appreciate you writing it. As a woman I was horrified at Brynn’s behaviour in the RHONY finale, but as a white woman there were elements I had not considered. Thank you for taking the time.
Thank you for taking the time to read it and for the kind comment 🧡
loved this article and thank you for sharing! i’ve been feeling nervous/interested/unsure how they are going to handle this conversation at the reunion and will be disappointed/not surprised if it’s not handled well
Ohhh it will not be. I’m not holding out any hope for that. I’m predicting yelling, sobbing, and a lot of Andy making these faces 😟😞 before someone brings out cocktails, they do the most forced toast ever and rush to credits.
This episode had me shook for days and this article perfectly articulates why. I was even talking to people who would never watch reality tv in a million years about it like, I know you don’t partake in this mess but I need to talk about what just happened to me! Brynn has driven me crazy this entire season with the gaslighting and manipulating but this finale was a final straw. Her trauma has turned her vile and it’s her responsibility to do something about it.
Yes! Everyone supposedly hates the new rhony so there aren’t as many people to discuss it with. I can’t believe it go so dark so quickly. I said this in an earlier comment but she really needs to fire that therapist she speaks of and seek serious treatment.
Straight up inpatient
This was a beautifully written analysis."It was kind of amazing to watch someone utilize White tears while referring to their Blackness."... exactly. Brynn's brazen manipulation this season was insane to watch & although it's an established pattern of behavior, it is obvious she had it out for Ubah since the start.